When you pick up a game called Zombie Stripper Stole My Heart Then Ate My Brain, you’ve got a pretty decent idea what you’re letting yourself in for: scantily clad pixelated ass that you take pleasure in blasting. . . with BULLETS silly! I guess if you’re going to be dealing with zombies, they might as well be sexy (ish) stripper-zombies. . .
Now naturally, you’re not getting a Tolstoyan epic of a story here. What you’re getting is some ordeal about security guards at a convention of strippers is the middle of the zombie apocalypse. . or something like that anyway. To be honest, it’s not the story you’re going to remember this game for. The voice acting is dodgy and the writing is. . . meh. So let’s fast forward over that and get instead to the zombie strippers and their demise at your hands. You start with a pistol and work your way up from there. You’re given limited ammo (but you’ll find random drops as you go on). You fight your way through 20 waves of strippers in a medium-sized arena. You’ll be protecting a totally helpless NPC, upgrading guns as you progress and shooting at tits all night … with a gun, silly! The guns on offer range from handguns to grenade to a LMG; the upgrades as perfect for dispatching the large waves of zombie you’ll be facing, and though you will die a few times, you’ll generally easy enough to continue as your wave progress is saved. There are a couple of issues with Zombie Stripper Stole My Heart, namely that the zombie spawns are blatantly dodgy (they can form a whole army behind you even after you’ve cleared the wave). The controls aren’t perfect either. They can be jerky at times (though never even to ruin the game’s enjoyment). What we’re left with Zombie Strippers Stole My Heart and Ate My Brains is an entertaining shooter that could be made better with a few tweaks here and there. Still, if you just want to have blast dispatching a bunch of zombie strippers with guns, then you’re gonna love this. Overall: 3 / 5